I remember the second my mate Laura left for the Phnom Penh airport; that was it, I was alone.

My first thought was, ‘it’s 5am, go back to sleep’. Then I remembered that I was free to rent a scooter and zoom around Cambodia. (My friend Laura was absolutely scared of scooters.) So that was it, I was off, $4 a day, don’t mind if I do. I got caught in the monsoon rain, got completely lost in Phnom Penh, had a small scuffle with another scooter, and IT WAS LIKE THE SICKEST DAY!

This new freedom to go where I wanted, to eat when I wanted, just felt amazing. I was 21 years old and I smelt independence like never before. I made my way down to Kampot (a beautiful riverside town in Southern Cambodia).

And… I got really lonely. I was sick as a dog, scared to leave my private bathroom in case of any ‘accidents’ out and about, I had a world map shape sun burn on my back, this feeling was new to me.

I had people around me and even joined the pool team but I missed being able to literally just chat shit with a familiar face that wasn’t going to ask me where I’m from, or how long i’m staying or what I do for a fuc**** living. I wanted to make stupid teenage inside jokes with my mate, I needed to share how bad my Cambodia belly really was.

A few weeks later a couple more mates booked their flights to me me in Vietnam and the loneliness and Cambodia belly fixed itself (with a small hand from Immodium).

12 years later and I still can’t decide if I prefer to go solo or stick with an old friend.

I think what’s most important is knowing when to reach out to the ones you already love and more importantly, when to tell them to p*** off for a few days.